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十大簡潔英文準則七：精確片語
【學術專欄】
The best writing doesn’t waste words. It employs words efficiently. Recently our Facebook fans at TPS have been enjoying our new column Brevity: Valuing Each Word. For the past 4 months, we have asked fans to provide examples of brevity relevant to the Rule we were discussing for the week. Now that the 10 Ways to Shorten & Strengthen Your Academic Paper have been outlined, below we give you a recap of each Rule, as well as the correct answer and explanation to accompanying quiz question.
最佳的寫作，必須有效選用字句、惜字如金。TPS推出的新專欄競賽 「Brevity: Valuing Each Word簡潔準則：惜字如金」，請Facebook 粉絲寫出簡潔、流暢的詞彙/句子。經過數月的競賽後，已依序公布十大簡潔英文準則，在此集結題目、正確解答與解析刊登如下。
Rule # 7: Use precise phrases… An academic writer can tighten his paper, reduce word count, and connect more securely to a reader with phrasing that is appropriately exacting. In the sentence below, the writer was not precise in formulating a phrase about time. How can the sentence best be written shorter and stronger through more precise phrasing?
十大簡潔英文準則七：精確片語
寫作學術文章若能恰當使用精確的片語，能使文章更簡潔、減少字數，讓讀者更容易理解。下列句中時間片語並不精確，要如何精確使用片語，才能讓此句更精簡有力？
題目 Contest Sentence:
“For more than three decades, the U.S. space shuttle program gave American astronauts and scientists a reliable vehicle for conducting orbital explorations.”
正確解答 Answer: We believe the best revision is…We believe the best revision is… “For 30 years, the U.S. space shuttle program gave American astronauts and scientists a reliable vehicle for conducting orbital explorations.”
我們相信最佳寫法應為We believe the best revision is… “For 30 years, the U.S. space shuttle program gave American astronauts and scientists a reliable vehicle for conducting orbital explorations.”
This suggested revision reduces the word count to 20 from 22, which doesn’t seem like much perhaps. However, it also reduces the character count to 120 from 133, which is nearly 10 percent lower. A 10 percent shorter paper is measurably and significantly more concise. While the worth of a paper is not measured in total characters or pages or pounds, neither is it characterized by verbosity, long words, or imprecise language. Brevity, in the end, is mostly measured in the satisfaction of reader and writer.
照著建議修改片語措辭後，字數由 22 個字降為 20 個字，看來或許不多，但字母數從 133 降為 120，減少將近百分之十。文章字數減少百分之十，顯然更為簡潔。雖然文章好壞不能從總字母數、頁數或書本重量衡量，但冗長、用字多而不精確，無法成就一篇好文章。用字是否簡潔，多半可從讀者與作者是否滿意文章看出來。
The sentence as originally written is accurate. To be exact, space shuttles roared into space for three decades, two months and 26 days, the last flight occurring in July of this year. Yet in the context of this sentence, such detail would serve no purpose. It is accurate enough to stipulate that the shuttles flew “for 30 years.” One of the judgments academic writers must make on every page of every paper they write is how to balance the amount of detail with the pace and flow of the narrative.
原本的句子沒有錯誤；精確來說，太空梭升空的歷史已經有三十年兩個月又二十六天，最近一次發射在今年七月。不過在本句中，這些細節並沒有意義，只需說明太空梭歷史有「三十年」就夠了。作者在寫作學術論文時，每一頁都得判斷如何平衡細節多寡與敘事的節奏與連貫。
The other element in precise phrasing is research. Research adds to knowledge of a subject and knowledge contributes to brevity. Were a paper referring to economic activity in Zhuhai, there would be no benefit in writing “on the southern coast of China north of Macau…” when research produces a pinpoint reference—“in Zhuhai” or “in Guangdong Province.” Imprecise phrases often are the result of inadequate or lazy research, which an alert professor will quickly pick up on and mark down.
想要精確使用片語/詞組必須先進行一番研究，以便更了解主題，讓用字更簡潔。例如文章若提到珠海的經濟活動，多作一些研究能讓寫作更精確，不必寫「在中國南岸、澳門北方…」，直接點出「在珠海」或「在廣東省」即可。片語/詞組用字的不精確，多半來自於研究不確實或馬虎，機敏的教授一眼就能看穿，直接記上一筆。
最佳的寫作，必須有效選用字句、惜字如金。TPS推出的新專欄競賽 「Brevity: Valuing Each Word簡潔準則：惜字如金」，請Facebook 粉絲寫出簡潔、流暢的詞彙/句子。經過數月的競賽後，已依序公布十大簡潔英文準則，在此集結題目、正確解答與解析刊登如下。
Rule # 7: Use precise phrases… An academic writer can tighten his paper, reduce word count, and connect more securely to a reader with phrasing that is appropriately exacting. In the sentence below, the writer was not precise in formulating a phrase about time. How can the sentence best be written shorter and stronger through more precise phrasing?
十大簡潔英文準則七：精確片語
寫作學術文章若能恰當使用精確的片語，能使文章更簡潔、減少字數，讓讀者更容易理解。下列句中時間片語並不精確，要如何精確使用片語，才能讓此句更精簡有力？
題目 Contest Sentence:
“For more than three decades, the U.S. space shuttle program gave American astronauts and scientists a reliable vehicle for conducting orbital explorations.”
正確解答 Answer: We believe the best revision is…We believe the best revision is… “For 30 years, the U.S. space shuttle program gave American astronauts and scientists a reliable vehicle for conducting orbital explorations.”
我們相信最佳寫法應為We believe the best revision is… “For 30 years, the U.S. space shuttle program gave American astronauts and scientists a reliable vehicle for conducting orbital explorations.”
This suggested revision reduces the word count to 20 from 22, which doesn’t seem like much perhaps. However, it also reduces the character count to 120 from 133, which is nearly 10 percent lower. A 10 percent shorter paper is measurably and significantly more concise. While the worth of a paper is not measured in total characters or pages or pounds, neither is it characterized by verbosity, long words, or imprecise language. Brevity, in the end, is mostly measured in the satisfaction of reader and writer.
照著建議修改片語措辭後，字數由 22 個字降為 20 個字，看來或許不多，但字母數從 133 降為 120，減少將近百分之十。文章字數減少百分之十，顯然更為簡潔。雖然文章好壞不能從總字母數、頁數或書本重量衡量，但冗長、用字多而不精確，無法成就一篇好文章。用字是否簡潔，多半可從讀者與作者是否滿意文章看出來。
The sentence as originally written is accurate. To be exact, space shuttles roared into space for three decades, two months and 26 days, the last flight occurring in July of this year. Yet in the context of this sentence, such detail would serve no purpose. It is accurate enough to stipulate that the shuttles flew “for 30 years.” One of the judgments academic writers must make on every page of every paper they write is how to balance the amount of detail with the pace and flow of the narrative.
原本的句子沒有錯誤；精確來說，太空梭升空的歷史已經有三十年兩個月又二十六天，最近一次發射在今年七月。不過在本句中，這些細節並沒有意義，只需說明太空梭歷史有「三十年」就夠了。作者在寫作學術論文時，每一頁都得判斷如何平衡細節多寡與敘事的節奏與連貫。
The other element in precise phrasing is research. Research adds to knowledge of a subject and knowledge contributes to brevity. Were a paper referring to economic activity in Zhuhai, there would be no benefit in writing “on the southern coast of China north of Macau…” when research produces a pinpoint reference—“in Zhuhai” or “in Guangdong Province.” Imprecise phrases often are the result of inadequate or lazy research, which an alert professor will quickly pick up on and mark down.
想要精確使用片語/詞組必須先進行一番研究，以便更了解主題，讓用字更簡潔。例如文章若提到珠海的經濟活動，多作一些研究能讓寫作更精確，不必寫「在中國南岸、澳門北方…」，直接點出「在珠海」或「在廣東省」即可。片語/詞組用字的不精確，多半來自於研究不確實或馬虎，機敏的教授一眼就能看穿，直接記上一筆。
